We begin the "Tour of Dirty Dishes" with this set of hand-me-down plates. They were too ugly for my parents to use 30 years ago, but somehow these flowery plastic relics of the '70s have made it into the daily rotation in my kitchen. The curry stain on this one looks like a diaper stain.
Taking up most of the room in the sink are these ceramic bowls made by aspiring potters. There is no use in washing these bowls and putting them away in the cupboards. That would only be practical if they were stackable. This collection of uniquely crooked gems can only be safely piled below waist level, and is therefore left on constant display in my sink gallery.
The Minnesota State Historical Society has expressed interest in my long-running plastic cup installation, which I've proudly maintained for two decades. This set of commemorative 24-ounce cups from the Minneapolis Metrodome is surely sought after by collectors. There's Mickey Hatcher, Tom Brunansky, Gary Gaetti, Kent Hrbek and Kirby Puckett. The "Enjoy Coke" logo is prominently positioned on all sides of the cups, proof that they are pre-New Coke/Classic Coke era.
Even though Rollie Fingers played for the rival Milwaukee Brewers, Minnesota baseball fans still sip with reverence from my "Rollie Fingers Day" Hall of Fame cup. It features a list of Rollie's major career achievements, such as, "Four-time Rolaids Relief Pitcher of the Year." The list neglects to point out one achievement that the artist's rendering of Rollie makes quite clear: "Greatest handlebar moustache in baseball history."
This cup from Saints Roller Skating Center will surely take you back to Teen Beat Sunday Nights when everyone had combs in their back pockets, Foosball was the hot game in town, and the Foreigner and Loverboy songs were on a seemingly endless loop.
When it comes to plastic cups, nothing beats the Mega Buddy. This 60-ounce monster from a Kwik Trip store puts all Big Gulps and Hardee's Moose cups to shame.
Sadly, only two Smurf glasses remain from a once extensive collection. The artwork on them has faded considerably over the years. As a preservation effort, these glasses are reserved for special occasions only. You may drink Kool-Aid from them, nothing else.
Paul Lundgren is a newspaper columnist and a very nice man. His e-mail address is paul [at] geekprom.com.
